Helpful Tips to Master the Art of Networking as an Introvert

Social interactions can be draining, intimidating, and unproductive. 

Add to that the stress of making it a business social interaction, where you’re expected to behave confidently, articulately, and graciously as well as represent your expertise and make those crucial connections….

…and that’s the nightmare of networking.

Is it even worth it? 

And if it is worth it, how is the introverted networker to survive? 

Is Networking Worth It?

Networking is all about socializing and communicating with people who have similar interests. It is about having meaningful conversations and exchanging valuable information in a friendly and professional way. 

The ideal woman for this seems like someone who is welcoming, confident, articulate, adapts well to new environments, and is energized by face-to-face interaction.

That is why extroverts are thought to be especially gifted at this.

So if you didn’t draw the lucky networking personality card, do you just throw up your hands and pray your steady rate of cold emails will get you the connections you need?

Not at all. 

In fact, as an introvert, you can not only survive the networking process, but you have unique advantages and strengths that will actually make you thrive. 

(If you use them correctly. And I’m here to show you how)

So yes, networking is worth it. 

Here’s how to make it meaningful and productive. 

Introvert style. 

Mastering the Art of Networking as an Introvert

Tip 1: Be Yourself

One of the things that can feel so intimidating about the networking process is having this picture of what a networker is like. 

Maybe you picture a woman who is bubbly and confident, has a wicked sense of humor, rocks the high heel and blazer look, and winsomely wins her way into every business deal she desires. 

Maybe you picture someone who is nothing like you. 

So let’s just start there and blast that image away. 

You don’t need to become someone else to be a successful networker. 

You just need to be yourself. 

And believe it or not, as an introvert, you have a unique strength here. 

For example, maybe you don’t excel at big business gatherings but you are great at one-on-one conversations with people. You are great at making conversations meaningful. You are great at being authentic and sincere. 

Believe it or not, people like that (especially business people!)

So utilize those strengths. Don’t be fake and try to be someone you are not. That’s not only extremely difficult, but dishonest, and ultimately will do you more harm than good. 

You can get the most out of professional conversations by establishing meaningful connections with people one-on-one or in smaller groups, where your authenticity, interest, and expertise can shine. 

Tip 2: Ease Yourself Into It

You don’t have to go for all the scary things at once. Take baby steps and ease your way into the networking world. 

For example, if you struggle with approaching people in large gatherings, try to arrange a smaller group or a one-on-one interaction first. Try approaching a person you want to talk to with a friend at your side before you try approaching alone. (You can even practice with that friend beforehand! It’s actually lots of fun.)

The point is: take little baby steps out of your comfort zone so you can take your time in adapting and getting used to new things. 

Each time you take a little step out of your comfort zone and it goes well, you will gain confidence, and the next step can be a little bigger. 

This leads us to…

Tip 3: Leverage the Positive Feedback Mechanism

Your brain has a really cool tool called the positive feedback mechanism. 

Basically what happens is this: 

Let’s say you go up to someone and introduce yourself and the following short interaction goes well. That might have been a scary step, but it went positively. Your brain will take that combination of adrenaline and positivity, and fuel it into motivation to do that thing again or maybe even go further the next time. 

This natural psychological phenomenon can help you get more and more comfortable with socializing and getting acquainted with people. Just take a little step in the right direction, and allow the positive feedback mechanism to guide you to the next thing.  

Tip 4: Set Easy Goals

Just like in any aspect of life, setting reachable goals can help your strategy, performance, and motivation—and further enforce the positive feedback mechanism! 

Set easy and reachable goals that are just outside your current comfort zone. You could set a goal to meet a certain number of new people at an event or acquire a particular number of contacts. 

You could set a goal to set up a lunch meeting or an informational interview [Krystal - Link to the informational interview blog post] with someone in your industry. 

Ask for help from people you already know. Create small and manageable tasks you can accomplish this week. 

Then do them. Seriously, stop thinking about doing these things and start doing them.

The ideas and potential upsides are literally endless. 

Tip 5: Play On Your Listening Powers

Many introverts are better listeners than talkers. Lean into that strength, and learn how to become a better listener. Find ways to ask insightful, open-ended questions. Listen effectively and gather information. Make the person you’re speaking to feel heard and understood. 

This will not only take some of the pressure from you but it will also make you good company. Everyone likes to be around a person who listens well, and many of your business contacts will be anxious to show off their expertise anyway! 

Let them do the talking and lean into your strength. Be the person who listens well. 

Tip 6: Don’t Disappear After Introductions

I know the introduction can feel like a big scary step but it’s important that you remain seen and heard even after you make it. Lean into that adrenaline rush and the advantage of opening the conversation. 

Approach someone. Say hello and ask them how they are. Small talk is not always bad. It can reconnect you with people and create a good, long-lasting relationship.

If you get good at asking a few, key small talk questions, you can learn the easiest ways for you to begin conversations and segway into topics of interest. You can also use this time to show off your new listening skills! And remember, people loooooove talking about themselves so be sure to ask them questions about themselves on topics that you find interesting.

Conversations that last and are meaningful ensure that people remember you in a positive way, which is exactly what you want. 

Tip 7: Network Online 

The internet and email open up a whole new world of ways to meet and connect with people. 

Just make sure you don’t hide there. 

Try to accomplish some of the face-to-face interactions first that is just outside your comfort zone so that you begin building confidence in those areas first. 

After you do that, keep working on the in-person stuff but also start exploring the options the internet has to offer.

Find phone numbers. Find companies and people in your industry. Send an email to see if you can call or treat them to coffee.

Learn about advocating for yourself. Learn how to write good emails that get responses and show the other person what you have to offer.

The internet offers a myriad of opportunities for networking and connecting with others. It can open doors that are otherwise closed, help you narrow down the places you would fit in best, and takes some of the pressure off the initial meeting. 

It can be a good way to expand and ease into further habits of networking.

• You do not need to become an extrovert to be an effective networker. Capitalize on your own strengths and create relationships with people in your own particular way. 
• Take baby steps and ease your way into what intimidates you. 
• When you step out of your comfort zone and it goes well, your brain naturally uses that positivity to create motivation and reinforce the experience. Use that to your advantage.
• Set small challenges and goals for yourself, such as meeting a certain number of people at a gathering. 
• If you are uncomfortable talking, become a better listener. Ask questions and let the other person speak. 
• Follow up with people you meet and like at social gatherings. Don’t disappear after your introduction.